// . . . // thoughts

". . ." speech

( . . .) cat thoughts / talk <= = = you will understand when you get to that part. . .

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Hanamichi involuntarily flinched when he felt his cuts rip open. Struggling not to wince, he shook his wrist rudely out of Rukawa's reach. "What did you do that for?! You stupid kitsune!"

Ice-cold blue eyes widened at the red stain seeping slowly through his Hana's bandages. //He's hurt! Who did this to him?! Who dared to touch no hurt HIS Hana?!// Rukawa's eyes flickered with anger. //Nobody touches HIS possessions . . . okay so Hana is not technically his yet but he will be!//

The boy in the mirror felt his heart clench with panic. //This wasn't supposed to happen. The stupid kitsune looks so angry but then who wouldn't be? Who would like to be blackmailed into dragging your archenemy around town?// Hana's spirits sank lower. //Why do I care what he thinks anyway? He never showed me anything better than a death glare. Nobody ever showed me anything better than a glare. Not even . . .// Hana reigned the boy back inside him and slapped on his baka mask.

Grinning stupidly, Hanamichi brushed past an angry kitsune, towards the direction of Shohoku High. "The Tensai was washing the dishes when a knife jumped up and tried to kill me. It must have been jealous of the Tensai's good looks. Since I'm the greatest genius ever, the knife didn't do anything much but scratch me a little, which is more than I can say for you stupid kitsune."

Rukawa glowered at the retreating fiery-headed figure. //Nobody that stupid will believe that lie. Who dared hurt HIS Hana? Who had so much control over his doaho that the idiot would go as far as lying for him?// Rukawa stalked after Hanamichi, his blue eyes scowling at the monkey. //If it is that pervert Sendoh, hes going to die a slow and painful death or maybe its that old guy, Maki, from Kainan or maybe it is . . .//

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Rukawa was still glowering as he slouched his way into the basketball courts.

"Did you get the baka Rukawa?" Ayako immediately pounced on him when he slid the door open.

Rukawa gave a slight nod and headed silently to the hoops. His bad mood did not improve the slightest as his fan club began chanting his name like some ancient occult, the moment he set foot through the door.

Make that chanting and screaming . . .

Oh eek! And drooling. . .

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Hanamichi had gone to the school nurse for the jealous knife wound. Of course the nurse didn't believe him. Who would anyway? But she never said anything to him, just bandaged his wrists and shooed him out of her office. Unwanted as always. At least he had cleaner bandages, he mused to himself.

The warm afternoon heat seems to be disappearing. A cold wind picked up from the North, scattering the leaves outside the basketball court. Shivering, Hanamichi was just about to throw open the door, and shout out in his make believe idiocy, his beloved existence to the world, when . . .

voices . . .

talking about him. . .

Tentatively, Hanamichi pressed an ear to the door and immediately wished he hadn't.

". . . seen that idiot!" Miyagi bellowed. "Hopeless case!"

"I don't want to sound mean or anything. . ." Haruko's voice sounded somewhat muffled through the door. "but Sakuragi-san hasn't been improving a lot lately. He's always late and disappears early."

"Not improving? That's an understatement! If the baka comes today, I'll be expecting him to polish the floors and run 50 times around the school! And then do the basics!"

"Wasting my time with him when I could be practicing. That ungrateful bastard! He walked out on me! I waited TWO fucking hours!" Mitsui said angrily. "If Anzai-sensei didn't insist on teaching that baka, I wouldn't even bother playing against him at all!"

"Think on the good side of it Mitchy. At least we don't need to listen to his stupid song! Or listen to his yapping voice!"

"Oh God! Don't remind me of the song! I didn't . . ."

Hanamichi supposed he should feel upset. Perhaps even angry enough to charge in and punish them with head butts. He should at least feel something . . . right? Sadness? Betrayal?

No.

He didn't feel anything.

Maybe he was still shocked.

Shocked over their bluntness. . .

Shocked over their betrayal. . .

Shocked over their hatred . . .

No. . .

He wasn't shocked.

He wasn't even surprised.

He just . . .* was *

He felt nothing.

Absolutely nothing.

It was just like that phasing out he did whenever Oyaji beats him. Only more physical.

He wasn't the spirit anymore. He was still him. Still the boy in the mirror he saw everyday.

Hanamichi sighed softly to himself and turned to go back home. He doesn't like staying in a place where he doesn't belong.

Come to think about it. . . he doesn't really belong home either. . .

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Two hours later found Hanamichi sitting on a park bench. This was the park where he had always retreated to when he couldn't return home.

It was a quiet place. Not many people visited here, or even knew of this forgotten place. The park was rumored to be the pick-up place where child murderers hid. After last year's incident of an 8-year old body found drowned in the small pond, the park had been left even more deserted.

A lonesome and forgotten place . . . kind of like himself. Hanamichi thought ruefully as he absentmindedly stroked the soft black head of a stray cat purring on his lap.

"Are you all by yourself too?"

The cat purred in reply, blinking his golden eyes at the red-head. (I'm with you, stupid human.)

The human frowned. "Aren't you the one who slept on my head last week?"

Purrrrrrrrr~~~~~~. (I'm surprised you remember. This is * my * territory you know. . . I smelled your blood the moment you walked you entered.)

Hanamichi sat there for a moment, as the cat took a cautious sniff at his bandaged hand.

"You know, they never even ask. There was never a 'how are you Sakuragi?' or a 'how do you feel today Hana' it has always been a 'urasai baka!'"

The cat purred at the human. (how did you get hurt?)

"Mitsui didn't even ask me why I was late. Nobody did."

(Who is Mitsui?)

"They didn't even ask me why I didn't turn up for a whole week when Oyaji accidentally fractured my left ankle. . .

"Or the time when I had my left wrist bandaged up for the world to see. . .

"Maybe thats why I don't really care. . . There's nothing left to be cared for. . . They never bothered to ask me why I acted like the baka. They never tried to see past the mask. . ."

The cat could see clearly that his human pet was upset. Puuurrrrrrrrrr~~~~~ (Dont be upset! Give me a tummy rub!)

"Are you hungry?" Hanamichi asked softly, wiping away a stray tear from his cheek.

Purrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. (starving. . .but rub my tummy first. . .) The cat turned on his back revealing a stripped gray tummy. (rub. . . rub. . .)

Hanamichi rubbed the tomcat's soft belly as requested. "I wish I could be a cat too. . ."

Puuurrrrrrrrrrrrrr. . . (I'm glad you're not. )

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"ITS BEEN TWO HOURS! WHERE THE HELL IS THAT BAKA?!?!?!" Ayako screeched, whacking her paper fan against the wall. "RUKAWA YOU BETTER EXPLAIN THIS!!!!"

Rukawa shrugged and stalked out of the courts, his spirits at an all time low. //Where is my do'aho? He said he'll be here after he went to the nurse. . .// He slung his bag over his shoulder gracefully. //Maybe he lost his way. . .//

"RUKAWA!! IM TALKING TO YOU!!!!" Ayako screeched again.

Rukawa turned to face the fuming female slowly. " . . ." translation: go away I'm in a bad mood.

Ayako stopped her screaming for a moment to decipher his '. . .', by then Rukawa was already off looking for his lost do'aho.

"OI!!! GET YOUR ASS BACK IN HERE RUKAWA!!!!"

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Hanamichi clutched his chest as he ran down the block, away from the place called home. . . away from the place where Oyaji was. . .

He was only 15 minutes late! He didn't go to practice either! Just like Oyaji wanted him to.

Of course he hadn't believed him. Who'd believe in him anyway?

Oyaji was drunk again. So what else was new?

A broken rib? Or maybe it was fractured . . .

Half a dozen of permanent blue and yellow bruises decorated all over his body?

The pain threatened to drown out his senses. Maybe it is best that way. At least he's still alive . . .

He staggered into the forgotten park, the gray cat stared unblinkingly at the bruised and bleeding human.

So it was another night in the park for him . . .

What else is new?

Funny. . . he could have sworn the cat turned black there for a moment. . .